te amo como se aman ciertas cosas oscuras
secretamente, entre la sombra y el alma

Saturday, August 8, 2015

Game of Thrones: Ice and Fire! Wear Your House Proudly (and pray to the gods, old and new, that it's not burning...or at least not yet)

You bought the volumes a few years ago. You have read and re-read them...say, three or four times. You watched the HBO series, with the complete understanding that the show is a show and the books are well...books. So expectations are set somewhat correctly: that they would be different, of course. This did not prevent those 'cringing' and 'wringing-your-hands' moments though. But you survived, with your sanity in tact. Still.

Season five is done, so you re-watched the series from the start. That is about 3000 minutes of your life. But so far, The Winds Of Winter is still barely a whispher in the wind. Dust in the wind. It is known. It is no use pleading with George Martin. He will kill all of the characters, thousands of them, if people irk him enough about writing like a wind. He is the author, so he will write as he pleases, when he pleases. It is known. All that you can do is pray to the gods, the old as well as the new ones, for his health. And that he would stay away from pork and beans (what?bad joint pains could be extremely bothersome, you know?) for the time being. You will never ever forgive him if he perishes before the saga is concluded. I am sure there are hundreds of others out there that would call upon the Lord of Light to bring him back, just so they could stick Ice (or whatever is left of it) between his hollowed heart, if that happens. Three words: Get. In. Line. Nah. You are not one for violence. The thing is, between the re-readings and the re-watchings, you have warmed up to the White Walkers and their beautiful blue eyes, that you might as well end up rooting for them...at the end of it all. Well, you know, Robert Frost said that for destruction Ice Is also great And would suffice. Cannot argue with the poet, he is the boss.  

True, this waiting game is no fun. But as they say, when you play the game...you win, or you die. So while at it, why not wear your House shirt. Any moment could be your last moment after all. Haha, the theatrics.

Painted this with acrylic. Armor-like, eh? FRONT

Back.
All together now. Dracarys.
I also made House Stark. Big shirt.
Could not find any other plain shirt at the time.
Up North. Up close.


So, dear friends. Wait in style.

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Guimaras Es-cah-pay (It's spelled just like the word ESCAPE)



Dory: [Reading a door] Hey, look. "Esc-a-pay". Hey, it's spelled just like escape...





Earlier this year, I visited Guimaras. Twice. The first was a three-day visit, and the second (it was after a month), a five-day visit. Obligation. Well, sort of, but not really. Each visit was a welcomed E-S-C-A-P-E (es-cah-pay!) for me. A break, though sans KitKat. I have only been to Iloilo and Guimaras four times in my life, and truth is, I have not seen much of the place as I would have liked to. But I take what I can get.

Guimaras is a small island famous for its super-sweet mangoes. Truism. You can get there through plane via Iloilo. From the Iloilo airport you can take a cab or van to Iloilo City harbor (Ortiz Wharf) which will take an hour or so, and then a take boat ride (about 15 minutes, I think) to Jordan, which is the main port of entry in Guimaras. Once you get there, it is a free reign. Be Dora the explorer--no need for a map, just your trusty backpack. You will be fine and dandy.

I enjoyed my stay there. I did plenty of walking (I am very fond of walking, I am saying this the Elizabeth Bennet way), eating (fresh fish, fresh vegetables), and sleeping. I find that the place is very conducive to introspection. The houses are far apart, the air everywhere is fresh, the roads are clean and "new-ish", the stars seemed to shine brighter there; and goodness...I have not seen so much of the color green since goodnesswhen. And it was exhilarating. Truly so. It is a peaceful place; and no, not in the "if a yawn could yawn" peaceful kind of way. A beautiful, peaceful place.


My old "Clicking-Away" ways....Click 1, 2, 3, 4

Like the windmills of your mind. In the municipality of San Lorenzo. Cool.

Alobijod Cove. My first taste of salt-water in almost two years. Just keep swimming, Dory.


What can I say? It was a great Es-cah-pay!

Dory, you are such an inspiration, mate!
And that is all folks. I wish you all a wonderful e-s-c-a-p-e, too.

Monday, May 4, 2015

How (The) Lorde Saved My Phone From A Pickpocket (yes, you know who you are, sir)

She stopped singing. Seriously.


Commuting is not something that could be rightly considered as one of the banes of a normal human being's existence. Inefficient, terrible transportation system is (this is in tie with dreadful drainage system in my books). Just imagine: the crowd waiting in line, the crawling traffic, the noise and pollution (sometimes I fear of developing lung cancer and I do not even smoke). One could never grow accustomed to it all. I highly doubt it. And this is coming from a person who has been commuting most of her life. Moi. 


But hey...there may be people (super people) out there who are totally fine with commuting. You know, like "No sweat!". Well, I will have you know that being at peace with it is a gift; so if you have it, treasure it. Good for you. However, for the majority—normal un-gifted people—this mundane, unavoidable part of daily life, is a very powerful stress contributor. So, kudos to you my dear fellows!


Well, it was one ordinary Monday morning, a few weeks ago, and I was engaging in this aforementioned mundane activity when a miracle happened. Most of the times, when I am commuting, I put on my headphones and play some music because it helps tune out the noises. The song that I play (yes, I usually just play one song on loop and yes, i am crazy that way) depends on how I feel when I wake up in the morning. If I am feeling chirpy, I play an Ella Fitzgerald song or one from Bessie Smith or Bob Dylan perhaps. If I feel a bit gloomy, I turn to Edith Piaf's "La Vie En Rose" or Pachelbel's "Cannon D" or Beethoven's "Fur Elise" or Bach's "Prelude in C Major" or Dvorak's "Humoresque". If I do not feel anything at all (or I could not discern what I was feeling), I usually just play anything random from Muse's "Uprising" to bond's "Victory" to "Winter Wonderland" (I listen to Christmas songs only when it is not Christmas), to the Voltes V theme. Anyways, that morning (since I have been binging on pop music these past couple of months) it was Lorde's "Team" on loop. So, I was inside this public utility vehicle and Lorde was singing "...and you know, we're on each other's team..." repeatedly while we were going through some bumpy parts of the road and suddenly it stopped. Silence. I was taken back to Earth (yes, my mind usually floats somewhere else). I checked my bag and the headphone jack was detached from the socket. I just shrugged; I put it back and pressed play again. I did not think any more of it, until the vehicle stopped and the man beside me, along with another man sitting on the other side, hurriedly got off. Then the person sitting in front of me said "Miss, he was trying to pick your bag. Have you lost something?" And I know I was supposed to say "Then why did you not say anything at all!", but I understand he was probably scared; and so I just said "No, nothing. But I believe he was trying to get my phone...". 

Then it all dawned on me that the Lorde saved my phone; and I was like "Thank you, Lorde!" (I swear this sounds funny if I am telling you this little story in person).  Thank you for being in my team. 


But why on earth would that person try to pick my phone when he knew I was listening to something in it, is beyond me. Surely he knew that the track I was listening to would either stop or blast out loudly (in case of different phone make or model) and therefore would rouse or confirm suspicions, right? Or perhaps he was planning to scurry away once he grabbed the phone...jumping out of the vehicle and all. Well, I should also say thank you to something called I.Q. and "Thank you again, Lorde!" (Insert all the theatrics here: pouring rain, while kneeling on the ground, both fists in the air, eyes closed, head tilted upwards, great thunder and lightning in the background. All that hilarious jazz.)


Here's Lorde:






Props to Lorde and the "Team". Now I am indebted.

Monday, August 25, 2014

It's Just A Spring Clean For The May Queen : PBB ALL IN Aftermath, Holiday, Cleaning, Reminiscing, Living, Star Trek, and Everything In Between

Someone asked me, "what happened?" Well, LIFE happened. No big deal.

We go on, because we, humans, are natural hope-fools. And that is great.

When I woke up this morning, I felt like I were hundred years old. And I am not even thirty yet. I remembered Led Zeppelin's Stairway to Heaven...and the line "it's just a spring clean for the May Queen", and decided to clean up and reduce the clutter around me. WHY clean up, you ask?

              "Spring cleaning is an old domestic ritual cleaning meant to do away with the               troubles of the past year and prepare for the coming year, and often includes                     disposing of old, useless things that have been lying around."

              "The May Queen was a maiden chosen by a village to represent the hopes                     and potential for the coming year. She was a symbol of beauty, spring and new                 beginnings."  <Here's the source...>


Expectations are just that...expectations. What will come to pass, will come to pass. With no regard for anybody's feelings. So what to do? We dust-off ourselves, stand up and strut-off.

So, amidst the dusting-off and cleaning I have found some old stuff that made me go...'ooohh, I remember!' Not much, but seriously I am like Dory from Finding Nemo, so it is a big deal that I remember some things, somehow...haha.




Dusting-off BOOKS, my preciousssss (ala-Gollum). I realized I have amassed a great number of books since graduating from college.


Yes, amassed....


And this...AMUSTSAY, amassed.  And yes, that is a Millionaire's Game box peeking over there. Yes, in this age and time, someone still plays that board game. No, you will not be bored--promise. Try playing it. Alone. You will learn a great DEAL about yourself. And no...you are not a looney. Well, I am not...right? Haha.




And ooohhh....I found my box of ASSORTEDNESS from the past. Hello to the Hazelnut and Dairy Milk over there!

My box-of-assortedness reminds me that life is a box of assortment, a hodge-podge of whatever. But remember: never ever let anyone put you in a box--be it a small one or a ginormous one. It would still be a box. Just be who you are, and not who other people want you to be...because the thing is, someone's not going to like you no matter how hard you try. Just remember the people who truly hold your affection and whose affections you hold: they would never find you wanting. And that should be enough.  Eh?



Ooohhh...Class Cards. Russian 10 and French 10 were my favorite subjects ever. True, they were not "uno". But I like them better than the subjects for which I got higher marks...

As long as you love what you are doing, as long as the universe allows you to do as you please...to do the things you really like doing, that you enjoy doing-- then marks would not really matter. That much. Yes, they also matter, but not that much...not to the extent that it would bother your mind day and night. I know that, generally, people need validation of some sort.  BUT then again...Remember the people who truly hold your affection and whose affections you hold: they would never find you wanting. And that should be enough.

Even if you looked like this once upon a time....


Haha...from our "freshie survival kit" booklet...





EUREKA! A pen is mightier than a sword, eh? Especially when your pen is made out of steel.  Excellent.

Do not fight fire with fire. It will be a big fire. Bashers will bash, haters will hate. Let us just hope they will all see the light, and they will experience such lightness of being, and then there would be no need to fight a not-so-useful battle.




Eureka again! Time to read this again. Uhm, are you a Geek?

This book is GOLD. The title says it all. I am reeking of geekiness right now.... Should I be ashamed? Let us check out some of the pages....



Are the Klingons also bashers and haters? 



This is the key to UNDERSTANDING. And a step to eliminate fear, and subsequently, HATRED.





Ohhh no....I should have warned them. RED is my favorite color as well. BUT a big 'Oh no....'

Forgive me, I should have made this known...nnnnoooooooooh (both fists in the air, thunder and lightning in the background). 









BUT you know what...life goes on. 

Just say the magic words, "Beam me up, Scotty!".








Not the end, just a new beginning....


IT'S NOT AN ENDING, BUT A NEW BEGINNING...



I have scribbled this in one of my notebooks....once upon a time.

Yes. Dreamers, say no to 'dying embers'.  Go on...fan that flame.


SEE...cleaning and de-cluttering could be very therapeutic.... You may re-discover and re-learn some things while going through old stuff, which in turn will let you re-discover and re-learn things about yourself--remind you of who you are as a person. That petty stuff are just that...petty stuff. And  so, we dust-off ourselves, stand up and strut-off. This goes to everyone... ^_^




The proper reaction to last night's turn of events....




All's well that ends well. -Shakespeare



C'est tout....

-mrct

Saturday, August 23, 2014

PBB ALL IN: To BBE or Not To BBE Jane—that is the question...

No fear, Shakespeare!

I do not understand the level of animosity or the hatred that is directed toward this girl. True, I know not much of hate—just a little, thanks to the documentary “The Anatomy of Hate by Mike Ramsdell (go watch it, it is good: it could widen your horizon, be it a cloudy horizon); and after watching it, I can only feel pity for those who succumb to hatred. And I do not want to pity anyone, because I know people generally do not want to be pitied—it makes some of them go defensive, and eventually resentful.

It is just that I have read somewhere that some people hate her, they want to BBE her (and urging other HMs’ supporters to unite against her). And the reasons? Here are some of them: She is a celebrity, it is unfair; she is ‘walang bubog’, ‘hindi nagagalit’, ‘tinatago nya bad traits nya at good lang pinapakita’ a.k.a. PVC (plastik), too good to be true ‘dahil maganda at talented at lahat-lahat na’, touchy (insert your own word here if it will make you happy).

Huh? Let us see….

· To hate her because she is a celebrity and it is unfair to others…

Uhm, is this edition not called “ALL IN”? You may safely and proudly say it is unfair if it is PBB Tightwad Edition, and she is not a tightwad. Then you could call her huwad. But this is All In. She is not the only “celebrity” who entered the Yellow House, right? And she is still there—so what does it say about her, about the people who support her? And besides, even if it is ALL IN, when each entered that house, it is not their so-called “status” (she could be a frog princess for all we care, or not) but who they are as a person that they bring in to the table (for the good viewers to feast upon). So, like her or like her not—but do not simply say, “because she is a celebrity”. That clearly spells insecurity. Hmm, rhyme.

· To hate her because she is ‘walang bubog’, ‘hindi nagagalit’…

Are you saying she is Zen-like? Haha. Far from it, perhaps; but you know what—I have noticed that the most secured of people—secured of who they are as a person—are the most generous and gracious when it comes to dealing with other people. They will let you be who you are, as long as you let them be who they are; so long as ‘hindi mo sila sinisiko’ (masakit na yun, eh). You know, the saying goes “your rights end where my feelings begin”…ooopss…I mean, “where the rights of others begin”. Well, people who have no insecurities in their “person” know that very well. Perhaps as long as there are no principles or personal values involved—you would never get them to punch you first, or have them return your punch. Even if you are annoying as a spot on a white linen shirt. Perhaps, they would just try to bear with the sting, with head held high, and talk it all out with you with a smile; or walk away, if they think you are a lost cause. Haha. True, she may have frustrations when it comes to her career, but over-all I think she is pretty much secured in who she is as a person—as defined mostly by her upbringing, by the values instilled in her.

So, what if she is like that, and that is the reason why she is “walang bubog”; and she does not hate perhaps because she tries to understand others, try to put herself in their shoes (even if she does not fit in some of them). I think it is hard to hate someone when you understand them somehow. And as for her being “hindi nagagalit”. Well, everybody gets angry at one point in time (though some are perpetually angry: be careful of such people). And it is normal to be angry, even the birds get angry, right? Go on, be angry at injustice, violence, etc. Anger is a feeling, an emotion. What determines what kind of person you are is how you act upon such surge of emotion. It does not make one less of a person if one is not accustomed to acting upon such feeling, especially—violently.

Tell me: Suppose a person is on a tight schedule and is currently busy applying finishing touches on a drawing board with a trusty pencil; and then comes a friend blabbering about goodness-knows-what and is really trying to be loud. And so the person tells the friend that what he is doing is really important, but the friend would not stop at all, and becomes louder in fact. And the person gets angry because someone is disturbing his peace and because things would not go well for him if he does not get the project finished on time. So the person say to his friend, ‘please stop’…and try to concentrate harder on the lines and shading on the drawing board—lest he finds himself sticking the sharp pencil into something else—something fleshy, and get himself into knee-deep-mud of trouble. Tell me, would you rather have the person act on his emotion and act on his instinct? It is over-the-top, I know. But would you say lashing out is truly different? I am sure Jane feels different range of emotions—hurt, frustration, feel ‘tampo’ and yes, perhaps anger even (depends on your definition—but you are saying she does not get angry. Oh well.)—but perhaps she is just level-headed enough and well…please refer to previous paragraph, thank you.

· ‘Tinatago nya bad traits nya, at good traits lang pinapakita’, ‘plastik’…

Basically, you are saying that all you see are her good traits? Good. At least the supporters and detractors are on the same page: she has good traits. You are looking for the bad traits—ones that you cannot see—so you say she is hiding them? She is not perfect, you know? No one said she is, no one expects her to be…. Well, she has been tested a lot of times in that house (I daresay it is already brutal); and you see what you see. Maybe it is not fool’s gold after all; maybe it really IS gold—when you scratch the surface, you will still find gold. So, please stop scratching that gold. It is a waste of your precious time. And Time is Gold. Eh?

· To hate her because she is too good to be true—‘dahil maganda at talented sya, at lahat-lahat na…”

To hate her because she is “beautiful”? (Okay, to keep my faith in humanity’s thought-process, I will pretend I have not read that somewhere at all, because such reason is…well—unreasonable.) So, you say she is too good to be true, and yes I know the saying “if it is too good to be true, it probably IS NOT true”. She is not perfect, you know? No one said she is, no one expects her to be…. But you are saying she is too good to be true. Are you saying that a young lady could not be beautiful, talented, kind, smart, patient, strong-willed, and whatnots all at once? History have seen many such women—young and old alike. You think that such is impossible—too good to be true? I mean if indeed she is ALL that (and from what you are saying, she is). Really—to believe it is not possible? And I thought I am the one with little faith in humanity…. *_*

· To hate her because she is ‘touchy’ (insert own word here if it makes you happy, jane-uinely happy)…

Holding-hands and hugs? Remember we do not know her through and through. Remember it takes two to tango. Remember she was quite isolated then, an outcast—and with only one person ‘seemingly’ trying to reach out. Although the reason why she was isolated and outcast in the first place was a bit shady (do you not think so?). Oh well. So it goes. Okay. ‘Touchy’, eh? But what if she is just comfortable with all of that—that there was no malice whatsoever with those ‘hand-holdings’ and hugs. That she was really that sweet with her friends. (Here is the part you would say: ‘whatever!’ Go on…). And people saw how it all changed after that so-called *cringe* confession. She became aware that something has changed in the dynamics of that ‘friendship’. Then one thing happened after another, and then things went kaput—for the better. Haha.

Anyway…you say ‘touchy’ or whatchamacallit, so you hate her. I hope you do not have blinders or blinkers; and your field of vision is not too limited. But seriously, would you really hate someone for this?



 *******

Yes, I do not fully understand the level of animosity and hatred directed at her, but I want to. What would we be if we do not try to understand one another? We try to respect opinions, even if sometimes an opinion is formed out of not so factual facts, colored by our own biases, preconceptions, misconceptions, kcconception, etc.

But you know what, I just remembered a passage from Marcus Aurelius’ The Meditations (this is a nice read as well). Fine, if you would like a more popular reference: take that scene from the film “The Silence of The Lambs” between Dr. Hannibal Lecter and Clarice Starling (not yet an agent at the time)….

Hannibal: He covets. In fact, he covets being the very thing that you are. It’s his nature to covet. How do we begin to covet, Clarice? DO we seek out things to covet?

Clarice: No, we just—

Hannibal: No, precisely so. We begin by coveting what we see every day.”

__end of scene____


Well, you know covet is an archaic word, I guess. Not much in use these days. “To covet means to harbor a powerful desire for something that doesn’t belong to you, to want all of it, every bit of that something, for yourself.” *forgot the source, sorry; but I do not own this definition*

When you covet something, you either love it and wish nurture it, or hate it and seek out to destroy it. Really? If so, it figures.

First principles, Clarice…eh?

And here is the part you will say, I am not making any sense...



******

To BBE or Not To BBE… (I know I am butchering this famous line from ‘The Nunnery Scene’; but I hope Shakespeare is not rolling in his grave right now…)

So, what I understand is that it would be like this: %BBS - %BBE, right? [or if you wish, %BBS + (%BBE), same thing….], and BBS and BBE are taken as 100% separately.


Okay, please humor me and continue reading this nonsense:

Well, let us say this is not PBB—the one that you know of. They say it is better to see things from a distance…mmm…. Suppose this is PBB (Prisoners’ Bitay Boat), and suppose, these people are considered as the most delinquent, unproductive, and dangerous members of society; and to protect the good people of the PILI-PA TEH nation, they have been shipped off—bound to float in the endless sea. Here is the catch: one of them gets to return to living a normal life inland—through the good graces of the good peace-loving people of PILI-PA TEH. Only ONE. How? Through votes, of course! Yes, there are cameras inside the Bitay Boat. What—you thought no cameras? Where is the fun in that? And of course, they have an overseer, like a warden, as well. He is simply called PUYAT; but the prisoners secretly call him, Big Bother—obviously because he always bothers them. And Puyat has minions, his staff, called PUYATERS. Contrary to popular belief, they also sleep; though they all look puyat. Always.

Anyway, to cut the long story short, the time has already come to execute one of the prisoners by throwing the not-so-poor prisoner off the boat, ala-Captain Hook. The people can choose to BBS (Bitay Boat SAVE) or BBE (Bitay Boat EXECUTE) a prisoner. It is open voting, good people! The most notorious of the prisoners happened to have crossed rich, influential people, who would not be happy to see him/her again. They would surely BBE the not-so-poor soul. Then they would say, “Good riddance!” But the notorious prisoner has many great believers as well, who would want him/her to survive, to become the Bitay Boat WAGI.

Okay. So, it is %BBS - %BBE.  I am no math genius, and my old Math 17 professor can attest to that (if she is still living; oh, I hope she is still living…); but this would mean that if total BBS votes: 5,000,000 (this is 100%, right?), and total BBE votes: 2,000,000 (this is another %100, right); so if:

Prisoner A got 4, 000, 000 BBS votes (equivalent to 80% BBS), and a total of 1,500,000 BBE votes (75% BBE); so total % for Prisoner A would be: 5% (BBS-BBE, 80%-75%). Meanwhile, Prisoner B gets 900,000 BBS (18% BBS), and only 100,000 BBE (5% BBE); so Prisoner B’s total percentage would be 13% (BBS-BBE, 18%-5%). And Prisoner B would be saved! With only 900,000 wanting to save him/her, while prisoner A would be executed even if there are 4,000,000 votes from the good people who want to save his/her hide. 

Forgive me, but this is like comparing a big apple pie to a small apple pie and saying that they are of the same value. [Let us just say Prisoner C and D got the same number of votes: 50,000 BBS  votes (1% BBS) and 200,000 BBE votes (10%BBE) for each of them, that is equal to -9% (1%BBS-10%BBS).]

On the other hand, if we consider the total votes instead BBS and BBE, that is 7,000,000 (this is 100%):

Prisoner A (4,000,000 BBS – 1,500,000 BBE = 2,500,000/7,000,000 = 35.71%);
Prisoner B (900,000 BBS – 100,000 BBE = 800,000/7,000,000 = 11.43%)
Prisoner C and D (50,000 BBS – 200,000 BBE = -150,000/7,000,000 = -2.14%)

Clearly, in this case, Prisoner A would be saved and not Prisoner B. So what are we going for: Equality or Equity? Because the last time I checked, they do not—and cannot – mean the same thing.

(Oh, it turns out Prisoner A is none other than Robin Hood himself...ah, so that is why he has many supporters..too bad the system chucked him out with that first method...)

Perhaps, I have just completely misunderstood everything pertaining to the computation. If so, forgive me. I admit I am no math genius.  Enlighten me, please? This is why I love reading books. At least you can find poetic justice in some of them. (Note to self: MUST read Dante’s Inferno again.)


******

So, to BBE or Not To BBE Jane; that is the question.

Well, questions: do you like seeing people in pain? Do you like pain? Would you like to know the meaning of pain? Try wearing dental braces and have them adjusted every two weeks. Haha.

But seriously, To BBE or Not To BBE Jane? This is an easy one (sorry Hamlet—yours was a real dilemma; but this one is easy). If the only reasons given are akin to the ones above, then the answer is a resounding ‘No’, ‘Nope’. But I know some will say yes, because they would say she is a threat… Oh well.

Of course PBB is a game, if you would not BBE someone, it would not be well for your bet. You would say, “our hands are tied”, “but we have to or else…”, “big brother made us do this…”, “it’s eat or be eaten”.  Well, a study discovered that people are much more obedient than you might imagine (If you are interested, you may read it HERE)…and yet many people still wonder how people could be motivated to commit acts of such brutality towards each other (during WWII, Holocaust). Nah, must we be so serious? I am getting incoherent, but seriously (haha)….

In a perfect, just, world we would make someone win because of his/her strengths and admirable qualities alone, and not poke the wound of others (the competitors); in a perfect, just, world some heroic people would not have had to die and they would have just been normal decent people (remember EDSA). It would have been fine with me.

So, I know you have sent BBE this, BBE that; and you would still probably send some more. It is your choice, your money. But I hope, before you press that send button, you have re-evaluated your reasons for doing so. Why not just send BBS, and have your bet win according to his/her strengths and admirable qualities alone—and not by kicking others down, and by pouring salt on their wounds? Why not..? Oh, because you remember that this is a game and this ‘eat or be eaten rule’ (BBS/BBE) is on and you want to curse big brother but you cannot because you are conditioned to love big brother (read: George Orwell’s “1984”, where BIG BROTHER originated), but you wish this world is fair and so why not just send BBS all the way, but then…THIS is becoming a circular discourse. A sign that I must stop…


So…to the voters and supporters, good luck…you might find yourselves laughing at yourselves a week or two from now (and PBB would have cashed it all out by then). I know I will, I know I might even deny knowing this self. Haha. But it would be sweet if your BW IS the BW. And you know that you made one dream came true, that you were a fairy god mother at one point in time. Then it would not be that bad.

To the remaining HMs…good luck as well.…you might find yourselves laughing at yourselves a week or two from now (and PBB would have cashed it all out by then). I know you will. But it would be sweet if you are the BW. To have made your dream into reality by just being you; but you also remember that you have some really nice fairies out there…and you suddenly feel like a Disney character… But if all else fails…just say this:

“And why do my dreams, which should be the best part of me, why do my dreams, my wants, constantly humiliate me?...HEY, DREAM, I DREAMED YOU.”  —John Guare


And tread on….this life's road is wide enough to accommodate lots of dreaming dreamers....


And to Jane,

“We must live for the few who know and appreciate us, who judge and absolve us, and for whom we have the same affection and indulgence. The rest I look upon as a mere crowd, lively or sad, loyal or corrupt, from whom there is nothing to be expected but fleeting emotions, either pleasant or unpleasant, which leave no trace behind them.” Sarah Bernhardt, "the most famous actress the world has ever known."


And always know that you are one talented person. And that many people believe in you, not all...but still many.




That is all folks.

BBS JANE dear, pretty, wonderful people…while there is still time.